I hate to be “emo”, maybe it’s that time of the month and I’m feeling overly sensitive about things.
But..being in Tokyo with a lot of my friends and colleagues, I can’t help but feel insecure and inadequate in my skill set in terms of theory and designing Architecture. I don’t speak up in my group…I feel like sharing my ideas would be a mistake. My past partners have thought I was brilliant as a team mate, but this semester with this particular group I’ve chosen, I can’t help but doubt myself more than ever.
I’m going into my 5th and final year of my Undergraduate career at SCi-Arc, and I think about the past 4 years leading up to this, and I’m starting to feel freaked out that I feel like I didn’t learn anything. I mean…I know I did, but am I really applying what I know as a kid from SCi-Arc. Coming from such an “avant-garde” school, I feel like i fall short in terms of thinking out of the box. I should have a little more confidence in my skills, but sometimes I wonder how I got into this school.
Obviously they saw something of value in me, otherwise why would I get into such a small school….I just can’t seem to find what they saw.
How do you guys deal with confidence?